Planning for Spontaneity

You know what’s really great? I will tell you. Don’t worry – I’m not actually gonna make you guess. The question marks are rhetorical.

Doing fun stuff when it’s proposed is really great. Being spontaneous. Being that person that can fly by the seat of their pants and do the thing right that moment. Seize opportunities, or sweet free t-shirts, or whatever. It’s great.

also root fucking beer

Milk and Dark Chocolate Salted Caramels courtesy of Atomic Candy of Denton

It’s also impossible to be that person when you wait until you have literally no clean clothes before doing laundry. It’s impossible to invite someone you met at a bar back to your flat when you wait until you’re drowning in cat litter and shit to clean the bathroom. It’s impossible to fuck strangers when you don’t buy condoms.

You’re catching my meaning, I think.

So far this year I have utterly failed at my c25k training, mostly because I got really sick for a week and also my complex locked our fitness room seemingly permanently and recommended a good local gym for me to go buy a membership to when I asked when our mini-gym would be open for business again. I wish you could see how unimpressed I am, but I have no idea how to emoji on a computer. But I have been working on something else – making room for fun and amazing things to happen to me. I’ve been concentrating on the basic life chores that I’ve always struggled so hard with, and it’s been working out great. When someone says “Let’s go for lunch” I can say ‘sweet.’ instead of ‘ugh I would love to but I can’t because I haven’t done my laundry in the past two months and I am not only out of clean underwear but also out of everything else I could possibly wear in public.’

It’s fucking awesome.

So…be nice to yourself. Make room for fun stuff to happen and it will. Yay for morality blogs.

Also, if you’re in Denton and haven’t been there yet, get your butt over to Atomic Candy. They’ve got a wall of English chocolates, they have fucking salted caramels, they sell those stupid fucking horse masks and bacon chocolates – It’s like if reddit made a candy store, but then there were also decent human beings there too. Unf.

That’s it. Have a fun day ilu xxxxx

DRUUUUUUUUUUUU— nk

Gods. I love that pun thing so much.

You know a useful thing we don’t have in america that we did in england? Units.

drunk sarang

I mean, it’s a sleepy cat, but I basically look like this when I’m drunk

UNITS of ALCOHOL. It’s almost like in my country we care more about drinking responsibly and that we accept alcohol as a natural part of culture not to be feared. Weird right? Fucking america being so puritanical. Ugh.

But yeah. When you say “i’ve had like 2.5 glasses of wine in the past 23 minutes.” people think “ugh you’re such a lightweight. that’s only like one more than one”

in english tho you can say “I’ve had like 4.5 units in the past 20m” and that actually sounds like something. And that’s where I am. Which is probably why my shoulders ache lol. My shoulders always ache when I’m wine drunk. But i wont whine, drunk. Because that’s not who I am.

IDET THART WA SA PUN. #drunk

New Year, New Dedication to Really Old, Unoriginal Resolutions

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My resolution for this year is to be able to run a 5k. Well, and to write every day, but I’ve already failed that one so let’s not talk about it.

I want to run several 5ks this year ideally, but I’m pretty sure I need to be able to run one first. I’m using the renowned C25K Free! app and yeah, I definitely decided to do a Week 0 because I’m not really able to do 8 intervals right now, but you know what? One must start at the beginning of one’s own path. And I refuse to feel bad about the fact that I have the stamina of an incredibly unfit 24 year old woman. Because I am that person. That person is literally who I am.

So training! M W F I’m doing the thing on the treadmill with the jogging. It’s a 3.7mph walk then a 6mph jog then back again for 90s:60s intervals respectively. Pretty exciting. And I was doing GREAT.

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And then this happened. I hooked up with a guy that gave me fair warning that he was feeling sick, and I caught a cold from him. Or the flu? Whatever. I was running 38.4°C fever and I’m only just now – a week later feeling better. I’m pretty much down to a cough and sinus pressure, which still knocks me out of the running game for now. But you better believe I’m not giving up. I may have lost my first fortnight of training, but I’m going to do the thing. This spring I’m gonna do some of those stupid social beer runs that Oak Street Draft House puts on, and this summer I’m gonna do one of those stupid Hotter Than Hell runs, and this fall I’m going to do that stupid zombie run and the paint one in Dallas with the colourful powder stuff, and next winter I’m going to do that stupid fucking Spirit of Christmas run. Because I’m spirited. And I’m going to be a fucking runner.

As soon as I can breathe without coughing up phlegm.

Subtle Hints

The medium to light-bodied crisp wine displays pleasant floral aromas and subtle citrus, pear and melon flavours complimented by a refreshing clean finish.

That is a lie. The melon flavour was subtle in the way that a brick to the head, or my mother, is subtle. This wine basically tasted like a melon air freshener dissolved in nail polish remover, but that certainly didn’t stop me from drinking half the bottle.

And you know what? By the end of my last glass I’m quite sure the couple I was trying to woo would agree that I was just as subtle as the melon flavour.

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