me: *rummaging around looking for clothes*
me: *finds baby onesie purchased for friend*
me: *throws it at roommate, who I recently exclusively sleep with* Here
BJ: What’s this for?
BJ: Congratulations? Oh you’re pregnant? Cool, who’s the father?
me: *dies laughing*
I’m healing! As in, I’m almost well. I have been doing the rest and fluids thing, and I’ve been steadily improving. Today I woke up and could breathe through my nose!! Best day ever. Now I’m having tea and preparing to have chicken soup. Smells so good.
Chicken soup for the stomach
I expect, and by expect I mean hope, that I’ll be well enough to celebrate Mardi Gras tomorrow night. Huzzah!
Now it’s time for soup, tea, and more Merlin marathon :)
Let’s talk about the colours of my lovers’-past eyes.
My eyes are brown. I like brown eyes
Dan was my first cereal boyfriend. He was English, his eyes were grey. In the sun in the conservatory with 45s playing on his turntable they looked exactly the same colour as the channel in October. No joke. They were full of laughter and lies. Super easy to read him.
Jon was my high school boyfriend. He was a redneck and stupidly proud of his racism and homophobia. His eyes were hazel I think? I get sick to my stomach when I think about his eyes. I’m lucky I got away.
Coll was my first apartment boyfriend. He was a white American boy. His eyes were blue. Like ice blue. Very pretty, very guileless. I think he probably treated me better than any other bf I’ve had. I’m glad we’re friends again now.
Brian was my freshman uni boyfriend. He was Korean-American and had brown eyes. They went golden, like dark honey, in the sunlight. I don’t know that he ever told me any truth. I think he maybe was in incredible pain. Idk.
Idr what color Jade’s eyes were. I think she said they were green. I remember she mostly looked upset at me. I was not an amazing girlfriend.
BJ isn’t a boyfriend and isn’t past, but his eyes are brown. They’re dark and warm and surprisingly deep. He almost never looks me in the eye, but when he does it kinda makes me dizzy.
It’s important to remember good things. It’s important to acknowledge that things that used to matter might not anymore. The colour of Dan’s eyes will always matter. The colour of Coll’s will always be a pleasant memory when I stumble upon it, but the colour of Jon’s eyes is better forgotten, along with that entire relationship. And the colour of Brian’s…probably won’t matter next year. But they were so beautiful at the time.
¡mamá, esto es brujería!
ughhhhhhhhh. I’m ill. I guess. I dunno. I woke up yesterday all like “Ack, where hast mine voice absconded to???” and then I did literally nothing but read [ extremely nsfw ] freaking torture porn fic all day in bed. Today I woke up and my voice was just gone, I had a pretty exciting cough, and I felt really fatigued. Nbd. Probs just cuz I stayed up until 10.30 PM reading. Ugh. So late.
I got home from work at like 11.30a, went to sleep at like 12.30p. Slept until like 5.30p.
Guess how I feel?
NOT BETTER. NOT AT ALL BETTER.
I made myself some spaghetti bolognese – probably the most draining spagbog I’ve EVER made – then I made myself some more mint tea w/ honey ( it’s magic. It makes your throat better because of magic. Iwannabeahedgewitchlemmealone ) and now I’m conked on the couch feeling like I’m definitely going to die. I’m even in my suicide PJ bottoms ( so called because they’re the PJ bottoms I was wearing when I tried to commit suicide. ) I mean, seriously. I feel awful. Achey all over, and totally out of it.
At least I don’t work super late tomorrow. I have some hashtags for when I’m feeling shit but refuse to give in:
#cantstop #wontstop #literallyincapableofstopping
Also, Sarang is cuddling with me, so that makes everything a bit better.